first day revelations...

On Sept 11th, five years after North Americans experienced one of its largest disasters, I nervously waited at Islington Station for Mikey’s mom and Aunt, clutching my bright yellow hold-all. I was hoping it made me invincible or heck, invisible at the least (doubtful considering the sheer propensity of my screaming yellow leather). It was officially the first day of my RCIA course.

For those of you who haven’t brushed up on your Catholicism as of late – RCIA stands for Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults. This is where strayed herds flock to reconnect with their faith and repent their past wrongs by delving into and completing their sacraments. It also happens to be phase 1 for other livestock, (re: hindu, muslim, jewish cattle etc), to explore and experience the role Catholicism might play in their existence. The class is every Monday night from 7:30 -9:30 all the way until the end of May. Their dearest and deepest hope is that all their students complete the course and graduate as fully baptized Catholics. In my entrance interview, I made it crystal that if for a second I felt like I was about to be victimized by being baptized against my will – that I would run. And I wasn’t afraid to take down the lovely old course moderator on my way out. Mikes has trained me well with all his shoving strategies witnessed on the subway.

Background: I was doing this to make Aunty happy. That’s all. I was learning about Mikeys religion, his ideologies, the roots of his belief system so in the event (lord forbid) we have children – I’ve got the tools to point them in the right direction. I’m not resentful for making this decision – it’s actually one of the clearest indicators that I must truly adore this man. However, I made it abundantly clear that while I was Hindu by birth, I was a practicing Hindu by choice. Arey Bhaghavan, I’ve got an Om emblazoned on the left side of my chest to reflect this definition of self. It is a key piece in the jana puzzle – and adamantly, I choose to keep it so. Now think about it people - could there be a worse candidate for conversion? That’s like marrying someone who proudly showcases a permanent tattoo of his ex’s name on his forehead – yup, see what I mean. No good can come of a union like that.

The Experience: The actual class was a group of 10. People were there for all types of reasons from completing missed confirmations, implementing a unified religion in their family, finding themselves, reconnecting with God, looking for answers, exploring due to an impending marriage – you name it – the room reflected it. And I didn’t feel as lost, as compromised, as sacrificial a lamb as I assumed I would. Actually, I was quite amazed by the experience.

You see, growing up in a convent made sure that I understood the Catholic faith, growing up with a mother who is inherently fascinated by all things catholic meant I learnt to respect it. In our little pooja room, Jesus hangs out with his homie Ganesh and they sure as heck kick it with Buddha on the occasion. I’d always envied my friends (real and flog bound) who have these communal religious groups that they participate in – activities, socials, athletics, prayer meets, conventions – you name it, these church bound people were doing it. It was the sense of community that my religion lacked. Ours exists as a purely personal bond with God – one that has no sermons, no publicized teachings, no take aways and action items – it was spirituality and religion at its purest form – man cocooning himself hungrily in that circle of divinity. And this is what I enjoy about being Hindu – that I can create a personal bond to soothe the restlessness within – no rules, just open doors. And that’s how we coexist with religion in my home.

So anyways, it’s not like I had my hate on when I embarked on this journey. But, I was surprised. Here you had, 10 people – jaded, cynical, weather beaten and worn down by life experiences – willing to place their trust in a higher power. Think newborns as they grasp at their mother’s nipple – trusting and vulnerable. I discovered things about these people that showcased their depth – things that you wouldn’t share with complete strangers, things you’d think twice to share with acquaintances. There in that little room, around that rectangular table – something shifted. And I witnessed the seed of humanity –which we all share – unequivocally. It’s eye opening to be in a room with that much faith, even the course director was amazed at what a wonderful introductory session we had. I felt closer to these people as we exited the building – excited to reconvene the following Monday.

And on my way home that night, I came to a tiny little miniscule revelation. I liked it. Now now, lets not get ahead of ourselves – I won’t be banging down any doors to dunk my head in holy water and call myself Anne but, maybe I’ll find a reason to claim this deed for myself. Like I told Mikey’s mom the morning after my foray into the other side – while I started this journey of faith to appease her I might actually find enough reasons to continue my commitment for myself. And THAT my dear friends, is HUGE.

After all, God by any name and any label is still God. It’s the simple and true knowledge that there is a higher power that exists above us all – a power that guides us and has set about a pre-determined purpose to our existences. Having that faith absolves you of bearing the burdens of the entire world on your own human shoulders. Seeing that light lets you rise above the pettiness of your current context – it breeds humility and nurtures awe for that elusive bigger picture. It helps you realize that while life can be fragile – that there is no doubt a fleet of higher beings looking out for the wellness of the world – a sect that you belong to by merely being alive.Now, is that comforting? Absolutely.

That night I walked out awakened. To myself. My spirituality. My religion. His religion. And the knowledge that at our very core we really are all the same, despite our personal paths or journey.

And that is the beginning of a world filled with epiphanies and revelations…